As Dude 1 is quickly speeding toward adulthood, I find myself getting choked up (and by choked up I mean sobbing my eyes puffy) over the smallest things.
Things like finding an old sock of his under the couch when we moved it to paint. Or coming across an “essay” on turtles he wrote in second grade.
And not just nostalgic type things turn on the waterworks.
Watching TV shows with teens in them has even become quite emotional for me (DID YOU SEE THE BLACKISH EPISODE WITH CHLoE AND COLLEGE?! Literally turned it off half way through).
And the idea that he could really, legally get his driver’s permit this summer.
Even just the fact that he’s getting so big is hard to face.
A few weeks ago, while standing in the lobby before Dude 3’s basketball game, I broke into tears when someone pointed out that he is taller than my husband.
I mean, I knew it, I know I am the mom to a teen boy and he has technically been taller than me for ages, but I hadn’t faced that he had gotten larger than his father. His father, the man.
MY BABY IS BIGGER THAN THE MAN I MARRIED.
And that’s why I stood there and sobbed in front of a room full of parents of 8 year olds awkwardly pretending not to look at me with my sobbing eyes and my foggy glasses.
There are so many things I’m not sure I am ready for as mom to a teen.
And, quite honestly, I don’t know what one does to prepare for the fact that this person, who has been your person for 18 years, deriving most of what gives them life from you, just up and goes off to become their own person who maybe checks in on Sunday, if he has time.
My brain is just not processing it at all.
10 Things Every Mom to a Teens Thinks As Their Kid Get Ready to Leave
Will I survive?
More importantly, will he?
Will he fail, or have I done all of the mom things I needed to do?
Like taught him to wash clothes and cook a meal without burning down the house?!
And, have I said all of the mom things I needed to say?
What happens if he gets sick? Or hurt?
And, will he call me and tell me things? Like, that he got sick and hurt last week and didn’t call me and tell me?
But, I’m so excited for him too! How can I be excited and sad at the same time?!
Do I need to figure out how Western Union works?
Will he miss me?
Will he know how much I miss him?
Being a mom to teens isn’t all sobbing and sadness, there are some good things about raising teens too!