At the beginning of every summer I have many high hopes.
High hopes for greatness.
Summer bridge activities for The Dudes.
Summer home organization projects for myself.
Summer fun vacation plans for the family.
This summer is no different.
Ours starts Friday so naturally I’ve made tons of
loose definitive somewhat conceptualized firmly scheduled plans for the season.
I mean I
kinda sorta know which of the fun Maryland family friendly activities we are planning to possibly try to enjoy.
So, when Mama Kat said something about sharing some
over ambitious amount of your vows for the summer on this week’s edition of Writer’s Workshop, I figured it would be easy.
Well, actually, my exact thoughts were, “I got this in the bag, biotches!”
Because yes, in my mind, pretty much every thought ends with the word biotches.
No reason, just ‘cause.
So here you have it. Dumb Mom’s Summer 30: A Vow to Keep it Haute While it’s Hot
This summer I vow to…
Not kill The Dudes. Just can’t make a commitment on this one, so forget it.
10lbs. 5lbs. Not GAIN 10lbs.
3. Run. Amok. I do enjoy jogging as a form of exercise just not when it’s a billion degrees outside. So, my fancy new running shoes are on a summer sabbatical with plans to be reinstated when the sun is a wee bit further from the Earth.
4. Watch something I love on TV. Live. No pausing for loud mouth, always whining/crying/yelling/complaining people. And, I’m not just talking about Dumb Dad, The Dudes do this stuff too. Watching a 30 minute sitcom uninterrupted has been a personal goal of mine for quite some time. This summer, it’s going down.
5. Shower before noon.
6. Be cooler. This is an area I actually already excel in so I’m just planning to fine tune a few key areas of my cool (particularly in the blogging department).
7. Learn how to Dougie. I know what you’re thinking. But, whatever. You probably didn’t even know what it was until I linked to it for you, meaning I’m already pretty friggin’ cool.
8. Take The Dudes somewhere they can run around without breaking anything that belongs to someone else or me. I can’t stop them from breaking a leg; the ball’s in their court on that one.
9. Wear my swimsuit. Because going to the pool in my sweats is not working out like I’d planned. Yesterday some
annoying little child of Chucky kid inadvertently squirted me with his oversized super soaker water gun. My sweats were wet for the duration of the trip which put me in a foul mood and made me look slightly ridiculous (yes, even more ridiculous than being in sweats at the pool made me look). Not sure when they started letting kids bring water guns to the pool, but I hate them for it and think they should immediately go back to the no toys allowed policy that allowed me to stay mostly dry. I don’t care it it’s less fun.
10. Read more. Not blogs, silly. Books.
11. Blog better. I don’t have the exact steps for this one laid out yet, but I’m working on it. See my Profile of a Power Mom Blogger post to see what it’s like to really be awesome.
12. Clean something. Probably only gonna get to like one thing this summer. I clean better in the winter. When it’s cold. And I need to work up some body heat to stay warm. In the summer months I do better sitting under an umbrella at the lake, dozing off while other people make sure my kids don’t drown.
13. Stalk someone awesome. Online. Real life stalking involves too much effort on my part. Plus, it requires a level of sneakiness I can’t muster. It’s hard to be clandestine with a team of monkey-donkeys following you every where you go, bucking and flinging poo. Justin would hear me coming a mile away.
14. Drink more water. Literally just realized that, for the past two days, I haven’t had anything other than the newest Aquafina FlavorSplash* I received (which is Raspberry by the way and it’s really just as tasty as the Kiwi Strawberry one I told ya’ll about a couple of weeks ago. I’m pushing the grape flavor off on #2 who would drink motor oil if you put it in a bottle with a screw on top, but I’m loving this one.). I guess that’s better than having six Diet Coke’s, but still a little good ole fashioned aqua would probably really help me on the dieting front.
15. Relax. Yeahright. But, it felt like the right thing to say.
And, I’m done.
I know Mama Kat suggested we make 30 summer vows, but I’m sure she was just kidding.
I’m not sure I plan to do 30 things this year, let alone this summer.
I can’t over commit myself like that.
More is less.
I mean, less is more, or something someone important once said that validates my point and makes me look awesome.
Happy freakin’ summer people.
*For the one person wondering, Thank Me Later Thursday is gone for good. It wasn’t working for any of us so I figured no one would really miss it. Mom Tip Tuesday is soon to be going the way of the TMLT dinosaur. I’m not dedicated enough to do this thing alone. I’ll give it a coupla more weeks to catch on though, so if you like it and you wanna participate, now’s the chance!
*You should know this by now, but in case you don’t read my blog *gasp* the Aquafina FlavorSplash has been provided to me for free along with other promotional items. As part of my arrangement with Mom Central I will also receive a gift card at the conclusion of this promotion. Don’t get jealous, I g;ad;y share some of the booty with you!