When I go to Target to buy clothing I expect to pay a reasonable price for a reasonably good quality of product.
I also expect to go in for a bottle of Tide and come out having spent $150 on plastic organizing bins, dude t-shirts, destructible dog toys, and more paper towels than one human family needs.
But, I digress.
When it comes to Target clothing, I imagine that after a respectable number of washes and mad Zumba, the crotch of my pants will start to get a little raunchy. And, my favorite white tank will get a little see-through-y.
I might find myself wanting to take a razor blade to my sweaters to get those little balls off of them. You know the ones. They always pop up right on your boobs so they are all in your face with the relative cheapness of the fabric.
But it’s cool because, things I buy at Target aren’t supposed to last forever. I really only buy trendy, seasonal type items there. And, I like it that I only have to pay like $30 to do so.
It’s not where I go to get my wardrobe staples.
Same at Payless. Same at Kohl’s.
Which is why, when I go into Target and lay eyes on a spectacular little blue jacket that I may have pushed a pregnant lady down to get at, I’m pretty upset when I see that it’s $200?
Two? Hundred? American? DOLLARS?
At Target? Oh, I expect more all right, I just don’t even see how this is paying less?
I mean I get it. It’s “designer”. Great.
Only, I don’t go to Target to get designer items.
I go to the consignment store and creep around the door until that one chick, with the sweet Lexus and the dope shoes pulls up with her tote of clothing to drop off. I’m a stalker like that.
I go to Target to get really cute gear at really reasonable prices.
I go to Target to get excited about the first thing I lay eyes on when I enter the door. Because I know I can afford it; no hesitation, no let down, no wondering if I have to eat refried beans for a week to afford it.
Same at Payless.
I don’t want to buy $50 shoes at Payless. I can get $50 shoes at stores I like WAY more.
And, honestly, there are few things I like getting at Kohl’s (it’s our branch in particular, not the brand as a whole I guess), including $70 dresses.
If I ever buy a $70 dress, which is so ridiculously rare it’s not even worth talking about, I ain’t gonna do it at Kohl’s. It’s gonna be a big deal. Like a leave-The-Dudes-at-home-with-their-daddy-and-go-to-Macy’s-with-my-mama-kinda-deal or something (slightly exaggerating for effect of course).
But mostly it’s Target I have beef with. And the fact that their designers-slumming-it-series is so annoyingly expensive and ridiculously cute…
Why, Target? WHY?!