The Ugly Truth About Fashion Blogging

I got into style and fashion blogging after the What NOT to Wear experience.

It was a natural progression; people wanted to know if I was keeping up my new look, and I wanted the accountability the Internet so often provides.

I’ve fallen off with it a lot lately though.

Dressing like a grown up lady is no longer a challenge, and no one really cares about a one-time guest on a reality makeover show that has since been canceled. Plus, I don’t have anything exotic to share. It’s pretty basic functional fashion for the everyday mom just to prove that you can look like a human even if you have three kids and work in your basement.

If I find something super cool, sure I want to share it with you all, but if there’s one thing I hate it’s being redundant (a blouse with jeans, a different blouse with jeans, hold the phone, is that a sparkly blouse?! With jeans?!) and also, style blogging is haaaard.

If you want to do it right, there are a lot of elements to making that happen.

You have to find a place to take pretty photos. And you have to have clothing. Lots of really cute clothing. And you have to do your hair and your make up and go stand around somewhere in the freezing cold and pose for countless photos while people stare at you.

Not an easy blogging day on the couch, let me just tell you.

But, when I really think about it, none of those issues are really even issues. Because, frankly, I’ve got all of that.

I live in a photographic city, I never change my hair, I pretty much always wear makeup, my clothes are darn cute (if I do say so myself), and I don’t really care if people stare. I will admit that I find the cold bearable, but annoying. And depressing. And so much less fun than sunny, warm temps I can look forward to in the summer.

The main thing that gets in the way of me and my career as a fashion blogging goddess is my lack of a personal photographer.

I know, I could use a remote, and a tripod. But, then getting those cityscape-ish pics would be virtually impossible because I’m not setting up a tripod and using a shutter in front of Starbucks (they have this nice brick exterior) while random people are milling about. That’s just a thousand times more trouble than it’s worth.

So, when possible, I enlist the relative talents of my spouse to wield the camera for me.

Only, unfortunately, when I say “relative talents” I mostly mean no talents at all.

He’s just not cut out for being behind the lens.

He’s scowly, and he holds the camera tilty, and instead of focusing on me, he focuses on whatever is behind me so I’m usually all blurry while the brick wall looks spectacular. He makes comments, and then I roll my eyes. Or he cracks jokes and then I laugh so hard I cry. And he has no understanding of the need for at least 15 shots in each outfit; like I’m not going to hate 99% of the photos. I need options!

The best part of all of this (and by best, please know I mean worst) is that he thinks he’s a boss with the camera. Let him tell it he has vision and technique and priceless captures I should pay him for with bacon for breakfast.

He’s wrong. Entirely. His pictures are not worth breakfast bacon.

I know, you think I’m exaggerating only let me present to you the evidence.

Exhibit A…

What. Is. This?

I can’t even guess what was happening here and I was there while it was happening!

Second, let me present the image I like to refer to as Eyes Wide Shut (also known as Face Blurry Shoes Crisp)…

And, another gem, Mouth Wide Open…

And, for my final piece of evidence I bring you a long time fave: Ain’t Nobody Got Time for This Tell Me You’re Kidding Please…

See? I can’t work like this.

I’m pretty sure no one can.

Thank goodness for PicMonkey…

Floral skirt, $39.  Denim jacket, $39. Wedge booties, $49. Skinny jeans, $31. Nike wedge, $90 (buying these NOW!). Collar necklace, $45. Bangle bracelet, $25. Biker jacket, $59. Geometric dress, $47. Short vest, $29. Mary Janes, $59.